Author: Grace Godwin
Over the years, we've witnessed sexual orientations evolved and people becoming more expressive about their sexual beliefs. But, do you know there are people who feel little to no romantic attraction to other people?
Seems weird, right? They exist, trust me!
These people are known as aromantics also known as "aro", they experience little or no romantic attraction regardless of sex or gender.
Aromanticism is a romantic
orientation, which most commonly describes people who experience little to no romantic attraction to other people. There are quite a number of reasons why people identify as aromantic. It may be as a result of being repulsed by romance or no desire to be in a romantic relationship.
Romantic attraction is about wanting a romantic relationship with someone and this can differ across individuals. Some aromantic people can be in a romantic relationship, they might want a romantic relationship without feeling romantic attraction towards a specific person.
Come with me, this is pretty interesting!
While most people desire romantic relationship and are willing to participate in consensual romantic acts with others, aromantics do not desire such. Hol'up! This does not mean that they do not have feelings, of course they do....they just do not feel the desire for romantic attraction, some aromantics do feel other types of attraction such as platonic or sexual but others don't. They also have loving relationships that have nothing to do with romance.
Are aromantics asexual?
People most often make the mistake of thinking that aromanticism and asexualism are the same, they are not the same and should not be used interchangeably.
Being Asexual means you do not have sexual attraction to others although you may feel romantic attraction. Most Asexuals desire romantic relationship but they do not have a desire for sexual attraction.
The term aromantic has nothing to with sex. It means you don’t get romantically attached to others, though you may develop sexual attractions. People of any sexual orientation can be aromantic.
One could be asexual, aromantic, or both.
While most aromantic people also identify as asexual, people with other sexual identities can also identify as aromantic for example an aromantic gay man, aromantic heterosexual or an aromantic bisexual.
Aromanticism exists on a spectrum and there are various aromantic spectrum identities
Demiromantic: These set of individuals only experience romantic attraction from the get go, they only experience romantic attraction only when a close bond has been formed.
Greyromantic: Their romantic attraction may be weak, unreliable or can only happen in specific circumstances. They experience romantic attraction very rarely.
Bellusromantic: They enjoy things related to romance i.e traditional romantic things but they do not feel romantic attraction.
Frayromantic: Romantic attraction can only occur when they barely know the person they are romantically attracted to but once they get to know the person more, they lose interest in them.
Quoiromantic: This is an individual who does not know how to differentiate between romantic and platonic attraction.
Lithromantic: Can experience romantic attraction but is not comfortable with the feeling being reciprocated.
Cupioromantic: Someone who doesn't experience romantic attraction but still desires a romantic relationship.
Aroflux: This is an individual whose romantic attraction can fluctuate but always stay on the aro spectrum.
Apothiromantic: someone who is aromantic and romance repulsed
Wow, this is quite a list!
Like everyone else, aromantics love having a variety of healthy relationship with their friends, family and acquaintances.
Also note that an aromantic person can engage in acts of romance to please someone else, this is not an indicator of romantic feelings and this does not take away the fact that they do not have a desire for romantic attraction.
Most people believe romance is normal and it is an essential part of intimate relationships, this may make aromantics feel not normal, but this is not the case, aromantic people are just as normal as alloromantics(people who desire romantic relationship). It is also important that we do not reduce aromanticism to what we think it might be, for example some people think aromantics are scared of commitment, you can be alloromantic and still be scared of committing to someone.
Aromantics are not against romance, they can still enjoy a good romance movie or novel without wanting to be in a romantic relationship themselves.
Aromantics do not need to be fixed, it is not helpful telling an aromantic person that they haven't found the right person or their aromanticism is just a phase that they will grow out of, no it's not just a phase.
It is important to note that everyone is different and aromantics are just as normal as every other human who desires romantic relationships.
Do you know anyone who you think may be aromantic?
Are you aromantic and want to share your experience?
On what spectrum do you think you belong?
Kindly join the conversation below.
Sources
https://www.healthline.com/health/aromantic
@aromantic._.pride
@aromamtic_nerd
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